Welcome to my Website
I created and authored this website, to assist people in their healing from complex trauma journey.
Also for those supporting someone they know, or wishing to educate themselves further about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder – PTSD, Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder C-PTSD, and complex trauma.
This website results from considerable research, plus my counselling and my insight into complex trauma.
It is aimed from the perspective of a survivor.
Many mental health professionals, use this website to increase their own understanding about
complex trauma and they recommend this website and my blog, to their clients.
~ Lilly Hope Lucario
(Please note I am in the process of updating and revamping this site)
See my articles published by ‘The Mighty’ – where I am now an official contributor:
What Is An Emotional Flashback – Lilly Hope Lucario
See my latest article about the harm caused throughout society in victim shaming
Victim Shaming Throughout Society Is More Abuse ~ Lilly Hope Lucario
For all REVIEWS of this Website – See The Reviews Tab In Menu
“Dear Lilly,
Your website is a major resource for many many people who privately search out this kind of
information about trauma and its consequences.
C-PTSD patients are very often misunderstood, misdiagnosed and therefore mistreated by
usually well meaning and compassionate mental health professionals.
Unfortunately, in general, there is still very little clinical recognition and understanding
of the usual causes : which are chronic exposure to domestic violence, coercive control and child abuse.
Your work shines a very important light on this problem.
In my opinion you are providing a major public health service.
Sincerely,
Stephanie Brandt MD”
15/06/19
On 14th July 2014, Pete Walker – a mental health professional and survivor of Complex Trauma, highly insightful into Complex PTSD - provided feedback on this Website and my work..
“I perused your website and it looks great. I commend you for the wonderful work you are doing,
and should you ever want to use any of my stuff on your site, please feel free .
It’s great to know you are out there.
Please keep up the great work ~ Pete Walker”
Professional Review From Shannon Thomas LCSW
– Southlake Christian Counseling
“As I put the finishing touches on the book and study guide, I am creating a Resource page to include.
There are many books, blogs and social media pages that are great and helping people.
When I thought about the different people to ask to be included in the book as a resource,
I went to my own bookshelf.
I went to my saved social media pages because those are the ones I seek out even
if they don’t show in my news feed.
I asked Lilly at Healing From Complex Trauma and Ptsd/cptsd to be included as one of the resources because her website http://www.healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.com/ is the most thorough
and user friendly I have found on the subject of Complex PTSD.
I have been to every page on the site and it is all grounded in clinical truth so people visiting can know that
what she is sharing is solid from a mental health perspective. It covers education about Complex PTSD and PTSD.
She also writes and shares blogs about living a life of recovery and healing.
The website covers the full spectrum of a survivors journey, not just the early stages of despair.
She maintains a vibrant Facebook page with over 30,000 (now 80,000+) followers because
clearly what she is saying resonates with many people.
Lilly is a brave woman who has turned her life story into a driving force to help others with
Complex PTSD and PTSD.
Thank you Lilly for everything you do each day ♡”
~ Shannon Thomas LCSW
I am honoured to be acknowledged in Shannon Thomas’ book..
‘Healing From Hidden Abuse’
Shannon personally acknowledged me as….
“Lilly Hope Lucario, you are a shining example of what an
empowered survivor can accomplish.
Your advocacy work to educate others is admirable.”
And added this Website as a recommended resource.
Shannon’s book is recommended as a resource.
Eve Hanley – Therapist
“I often refer clients your way for reading.
You normalise and express CPTSD so well it really helps between sessions.
So many return feeling your words give them permission
to tell their story and have hope.”
Angie Simonton – Therapist
“Ms. Lucario’s website offers a wealth of information for
Survivors of C-PTSD and for those who support them.
She creates a safe place where she “just gets it.”
She began offering this before the #metoo movement and helped
establish the term “Complex PTSD,” although it’s not yet a DSM diagnosis.
I highly recommend following her on all social media platforms
for a better understanding of trauma.”
Lynne Abel – Therapist
“As a therapist who works in this area, some of your references & resources
I already had, others I have printed off & used – thanks!
I appreciate the care you go to to ensure the quality of what you put on here.”
John D. Dawkins Jnr – Therapist
“I’m brand new to the site. I’m a psychotherapist in South Florida that
specializes in trauma.
I’ve been looking for a way to provide information to a broader audience
than just what I can do for my individual clients.”
Katherine Joseph – Therapist
“I am also one of those licensed mental health professionals
and Lilly’s work can be trusted, and is compassionate.”
My Blog has now reached over 2.5 million views!
See the blog link above, to direct you to my award winning blog.
Complex trauma has a deep impact on the nervous system. By understanding how it develops, you can better understand how to treat it.
Most of us have a chapter in our lives we’d rather forget. Whether it’s a devastating breakup or the death of a loved one, many of us have felt the sting of heartbreak that comes with being a human.
But for those who live with complex trauma, the memories don’t just live in the past. They live in the present moment, too.
For a long time, complex trauma wasn’t well understood. Now researchers estimate that more than 3% of people meet the criteria for complex trauma, also called complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD), in the United States. This is about the same percentage as people with traditional PTSD.
What is complex trauma?
Trauma, the kind you’ve likely heard of, can develop after a distinct traumatic experience. It occurs when the brain and body are so overwhelmed that they have a hard time easing out of “fight, flight, or freeze” mode and coming back into a relaxed state.
Trauma may refer to a single incident, while complex trauma refers to a series of traumatic events that take place over a long period of time, like months or years.
First introduced in the 1990s by Judith Lewis Herman, PhD, complex trauma has a lot in common with the classic symptoms of PTSD, such as:
- feeling anxious
- having flashbacks
- avoiding circumstances that remind you of the traumatic events
In addition, complex trauma can:
- distort your sense of self
- make it difficult to control your emotions
- cause relationships challenges
How does complex trauma develop?
When you experience a traumatic event, it activates the limbic system in the brain. This “fire alarm” shuts down all nonessential systems (rest, digestion, sleep) and floods your body with stress hormones, like cortisol, so you can prepare for fight, flight, or freeze.
Once the danger passes, your parasympathetic nervous system provides inner calm, otherwise known as your “rest and digest” mode.
At this point, normal cognitive function returns, and you can go back to your day with relatively few side effects, perhaps only feeling a little jittery for a while, or a bit on edge.
But for people who live with complex trauma, this balance doesn’t quite return all the way.
The limbic system stays engaged most of the time. It’s a coping mechanism to try and stay safe in the face of ongoing adversity. It’s an experience of constantly being in survival mode, or on edge.
Over time, it becomes a “new normal” for the brain and body.
In his book, “The Body Keeps the Score,” trauma expert Bessel van der Kolk, MD, describes how trauma literally becomes trapped in the body and the brain rewires itself. These lasting effects create symptoms of complex trauma.
This bodily state of your nervous system being on “high alert” can affect your thoughts, actions, and relationships.
Some symptoms of complex trauma include:
- flashbacks
- lapses in memory
- difficulty regulating emotions
- hyperarousal, or being “on alert”
- dissociation or lapses in memory
- depersonalization or derealization
- sleep disturbances or nightmares
- struggling in interpersonal relationships
- low self-esteem or negative self-perception
- avoiding people, places, or scenarios that upset you
Somatic (bodily) symptoms, like unexplained headaches or an upset stomach, are also common with complex trauma. Since the body is under chronic stress, it can lower your immune system and lead to a range of chronic health conditions.
Examples of complex trauma
Complex trauma can arise in any situation where you feel an ongoing sense of fear, horror, helplessness, or powerlessness over an extended period of time, with the perceived or actual inability to escape.
It usually stems from trauma you experienced in childhood, though it can develop from trauma in adulthood as well.
Some possible causes of complex trauma include:
- sexual abuse or incest
- ongoing physical or emotional abuse
- chronic neglect or abandonment
- medical abuse or medical trauma
- torture or being held captive
- enmeshment or engulfment trauma
- parentification (children taking on adult rules)
- human trafficking
- genocide campaigns
- living in a war zone or area of civil unrest
Tips for coping
Recovery from complex trauma can be a gradual process. But having a range of tools and self-care strategies can make the process a whole lot easier.
It’s a good idea to keep a few deep breathing exercises up your sleeve for those tough moments. This is a direct way to let your body know that you’re safe. Try these:
- 4-7-8 breathing: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds.
- Box breathing: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds.
- Alternate nostril breathing: Place your right thumb over your right nostril. Inhale and exhale eight times through your left nostril. Repeat on the other side.
A consistent mindfulness practice can help too. A 2018 study involving veterans with PTSD found that a regular meditation practice can reduce symptoms of trauma. Yoga has shown similar results, showing that both can be an effective complement to talk therapy.
It might help to access trauma-informed yoga sessions, where the yoga instructor is aware that trauma can be stored in the body, and that some body movements can trigger emotional reactions. They can help you navigate these reactions in a healing way.
Here are some lifestyle adjustments that can make complex trauma more manageable:
- do tai chi or dance
- journal your feelings
- spend time in nature
- eat a nutritious, balanced diet
- sleep around 8 hours a night
- “shake off” tough emotions by literally shaking your arms or your body to release tension
- talk through your triggers with loved ones
- practice progressive relaxation techniques
- exercise five times a week, even if only a few minutes a day
- try using the flashback halting protocol to manage flashbacks
